Thursday, January 26, 2012


I read a description the other day of a coffee cup that looks beautiful and whole and flawless, but when hot coffee was poured into the cup, it shattered. That's how I feel these days. I smile. I laugh, sometimes a little too loud, because if I'm laughing, I'm not crying.

I'm sitting in a coffee shop alone, because I needed a break and I am struggling to hold in tears, because I'm alone! It's crazy! I told my doctor that I'm depressed & she said "You don't looked depressed!". She said I was smiling, laughing and joking. Have you ever heard "Fake it till you make it?". That's what I was taught growing up. I was told that other people have it much worse than I do. That is very true, but when did life become a scorecard? I don't believe that is how life is meant to be lived. Keeping score. What a joke!

What are your thoughts on keeping score of the good & bad that life brings your way?

My gifts:

21. A beautiful 16 month old baby girl that just started telling me "I love you!".

22. A 13 year old boy that still thinks its cool to hug his momma.

23. An 11 year old girl that comes to me about everything.

24. A 4 year old girl that is full of hugs & energy.

25. A hubby that let me escape to the coffee shop for some alone time.

26. That same hubby cooking supper while I am gone.

27. An iced snickers coffee with whipped cream and chocolate toppings.

28. A nice, big, comfy chair to relax in.

29. Crosses hanging on the wall right in front of me. Reminding me of Christ's love.

30. A beautiful home that is loud and filled with laughter.

1 comment:

happyhome said...

You don't have to "look" depressed to be depressed. I faked it for years until I couldn't anymore. Freedome came when I stopped trying to fake it and started being real. Praying for your journey. Remember, it's a journey through your struggle. You aren't being left where you are! Love you!